Stay Loving With Husbands After Kids

The best time of our life usually happens when we are single, a time when everyday with our partner feels like its honeymoon. This is not to say that marriages are devoid of fun, or married couples cannot have the time of their lives, but being married and having kids comes with its responsibilities, which seems to put a strain on all the love happenings from the good old days.

Marriage should be a time to bond, share ,love, have fun and understand each other, but we know what happens when a third party is introduced in a relationship mostly in form of a child. Making a leap from coupledom to family with kids is exciting and wonderful, but it is also exhausting and worrisome. A combination that can be toxic to the romantic relationship that made you parents in the first place. we should know not to put our marriage on the back burner when the babies come. Once you become parents, your marriage matters more, not less because, now other people are counting on you.

At this point, there is a tilt in who gets more attention. As mothers, it’s natural that we tend to give more time to our kids and unconsciously relegate our husbands’ emotional needs to second place. As much as we try to balance the equation, we still put our kids’ needs above theirs. In doing this, we create a strain in our relationships and most often the men begin to feel “not needed”.

Most of us are also guilty of not trying too hard with our looks as much as we used too. Leaving ourselves to look really “baggy” in the wrong places, forgetting to shed our baby weight, all in the name of “that’s what I have to show for being a mom” Truth is, whether we accept it or not, a good body also helps to spice things up and keeps the love ignited. Getting our pre baby bodies back should not be taken for granted.

We have to remember the things we did for and to each other before the knots were tied and inculcate them in our daily lives. Appreciating our spouses through messages, cultivate the habit of doing things together; like taking a walk, taking a shower together, giving each other massages, random compliments, watching favorite shows together even if the other party doesn’t enjoy whatever is showing, snuggling or just holding hands, goodbye hugs, good night/welcome kisses, making out alone time for dinners, weekend getaways, shows how much you care about your spouse and how much we are willing to see the love sustained.

Sex is also very key. The presence of kids should not be the absence of the flirty aspect  that led to “steamy sessions” back in the day. As the lack of it can and may lead to adulterous ways...

It's good to note that kids go where there is excitement and stay where there is love .The best and most positive aspect of staying in love is that, when children are raised seeing their parents love each other in a respectful and positive manner, they have much better chance at having the same relationship with their spouse.